I have 99 problems... and today I'm going to write about Problem #1.
Here's the thing. It's easy to come up with problems, isn't it?
And the fun part is - you can come up with solutions!
This is a great pandemic of our society: Fixing, Fixing, Fixing, and more Fixing of things that don't actually need to be fixed at all!
Read: Creating problems that really don't exist.
The underlying belief of that?
There's something wrong with us and we need to be fixed.
Do you see?!
Isn't it oddly satisfying to come up with a problem? Ah hah! There we go. Now I know what's wrong.
Confirmation that we're right. There is something wrong with the world. Us.
BUT - that's not enough. Problems are problems. And the answer is to fix problems. What is the point otherwise? Just sit in your shitty pile of problems?
So fixing the problem is the perfect solution.
You see how this continues and continues and continues?
It's a never ending cycle. When we fix a problem (yay!) we get momentary satisfaction and then we find another problem to fix. And another. And another. The more we solve problems the more problems we'll have.
Now we've identified the Problem of all Problems. Why do we do this?
Now ask yourself this question: What is the payoff of the problem-solution cycle?
And even with all of those benefits, here's what the Problem is costing me:
Now ask yourself this question: What is this Problem-Solution cycle costing you?
Now I have another question for you: What is Possible outside of Problems?
Notice when you create unnecessary problems. Notice what it's costing you. Choose a new Possibility. Take action.
Ontological Coaching is designed to have you choose outside of your current "problems" and create your life from an entirely new place. You get to create results that never seemed possible before.
This post serves as a reminder for me to listen to my heart.
You may not know just how much time I spend in my head.
But if you spend any time with me you might have a good idea.
Most of the time I'm questioning, doubting, wondering, trying to figure things out.
Analyzing, judging, and totally stuck.
Even as I'm writing this post I'm searching... trying to find the right answer. What is the science of the heart? Where is the proof that it works?
My heart reminds me that there's nothing wrong.
There's no proof of that either... There's no proof that anything is wrong.
Our head will find the proof though. We will make up stories.
The brain can be trained to look for the solutions too. It is a powerful tool.
The heart can't be trained.
The heart can't get confused. Though we think it does. Maybe our brains our just too afraid (see previous post) to hear the truth that the heart is saying?
The heart knows
The heart is wise
The heart beats. It breathes. It lives. It is made of Truth. It's the organ of Love. It's the organ of Life.
What's sad to me is that we believe the stories of our mind. If we just listened to our hearts we would Know.
This serves as a reminder for me to listen to my heart.
Practice trusting my heart.
Seek forgiveness for the times I don't.
Always come back to Truth
Thank you for reading <3
We all have fears. That seems to be one of the themes of being human, doesn't it?
When someone is fearless, even then, we know that they feel the fear.
They feel the fear and they still act.
They know what is more important.
They know what is pulling them forward, through the fear, into action.
But it's not always that simple is it?
Fear is tricky and sticky.
Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real.
And when something appears real, we argue for it, do we not?
"I know he doesn't like me!"
"I don't have the money so what's the point in planning my trip?
"I have to end the relationship. I don't have any other options."
"I have to stay in this relationship. I don't have any other options."
etc. etc. etc.
What's the fear underlying your statements?
"I know he doesn't like me!" might be a fear of being rejected.
"I don't have the money so what's the point in planning my trip?" might be a fear of failure.
"I have to end the relationship. I don't have any other options." might be a fear of commitment.
"I have to stay in this relationship. I don't have any other options." might be a fear of looking bad.
What's the cost?
What's it costing you to believe in your fears?
In the one example of "I know he doesn't like me," fear of being rejected might be costing them some of the deepest joys of life! Fun, self expression, adventure, aliveness, fulfillment, self love, play.
Are you going to sacrifice THAT just to be comfortable?
Are you going to sacrifice THAT just to be right?!
What are you really committed to?
What is your life all about?
What do you really want?
These are the kinds of questions coaches will ask you.
The answers that you create will keep you in action even in the face of your fears.
So ask yourself these questions right now, and write down the answers. Paint them. Share them. Post them on your wall and review them every. Single. Day.
And remember that everyone has fears.
Everyone who is great has fears.
The only difference is how